PINTERESTing Foods

In keeping with my new years resolution to use Pinterest to inspire me to be more creative, the month of February was all about food. I made several new recipes that I found on Pinterest and some are keepers while others were just so-so. Below is the image from Pinterest with a link to the website for the directions to make each dish. Enjoy!

http://www.sixsistersstuff.com/2011/12/outback-steakhouse-alice-springs.html
This is super yummy, but I don't know how one can go wrong with a recipe that calls for bacon and cheese.

Really yummy and easy, I just cut a heart out of a slice of bread with a cookie cutter, put it in a frying pan and cooked an egg in the middle. Ella loved it!

http://www.shutterbean.com/kalechips/ If you didn't know what to do with kale, now you do! This is super duper easy and a healthy alternative to regular chips. I make them all the time now.

http://allrecipes.com/recipe/slow-cooker-pork-chops-ii/detail.aspx These are Jeff's absolute favorite pork chops. He asks for them at least once a week. They are so tender and fall apart when you take them out of the crockpot.

http://forkinit.blogspot.com/2010/09/crockpot-barbecue-chicken.html I made lots of crockpot reciepes this month because they are so easy and I can make them to have ready on evenings when I work so my husband doesn't starve. This one turned out pretty good but cooked a lot faster than the directions called for. It was a little dry so I will take it out earlier next time.

http://www.sixsistersstuff.com/2011/09/slow-cooker-orange-chicken.html This reciepe was not one of our favorites. It was okay, but I had to modify the recipe a lot. I used less orange juice concerntare and more brown sugar to make it taste better. I don't think I will cook it again, as the local Chinese restuarant has much better orange chicken.

http://blogs.babble.com/family-kitchen/2011/02/23/the-best-macaroni-and-cheese-ive-ever-made/ I searched for a new mac and cheese reipe and I wasn't disappointed with this one. It had a good cheesy flavor and the garlic gave it a zesty bite. Yummy!

http://www.kalynskitchen.com/2009/01/recipe-for-roasted-green-beans-with.html Easy, delicious veggies as a side for the BBQ chicken dinner.

http://www.inspiredbycharm.com/2012/02/very-pinteresting-pasta-pasta-pasta.html A four ingredient pasta dish that was a hit with my husband. I have so many more recipes pinned that I want to try, but I can happily say that I am out of my cooking rut!

Lollipop

Nicholas does not get to use his sense of taste very often as he cannot eat by mouth anymore. He is fed by a feeding tube that goes directly to his stomach. Nineteen months ago when he did a swallow study before his g-tube surgery, the x-ray images showed that his throat closes and food pools in his esophagus making eating by mouth nearly impossible for him. However, we like to allow him to have tastes of things as often as he likes. For Valentine's Day, his good friends, Grace & Harry, gave the kids lollipops and Nicholas was in Heaven, enjoying the sticky sweetness of his pop. You can see from the photos above that it made him grin from ear to ear. I have since invested in some dum-dum suckers so he can have licks whenever he likes and the small size of the dum-dum fits perfectly in his mouth. Although sucking on a lollipop is a small thing for any other three-year-old, for Nicholas it is one of life's simple pleasures that make for one happy little boy.

Ella is 17 Months

Our little pumpkin pants is seventeen-months-old today! She is busy, busy, busy. So much so that I am going to sign her up for soccer on Saturday mornings so she can play with other kids and get her energy out. I was so excited to learn that soccer starts for little ones at eighteen-months, so next month she will start soccer!! They do other activities there are well: parachute, running, and tumbling, in addition to playing with tiny soccer balls so I think Ella will have a lot of fun.
She is in between clothing sizes right now. Eighteen month size clothes still fit but are starting to get too small and twenty-four month size clothes are still a bit too big for her. She takes after her mama in the eating department. She loves any kind of food and tried sushi for the first time last night. She really liked it and we were careful to only give her cooked seafood in the sushi.
Everyday she puts on my shoes that sit by the front door and points to her coat and wants to go somewhere. We try to go for walks on nice days, but unfortunately we don't get too many of those in the Pacific Northwest. She is perfectly content to ride in the car and loves to go to anywhere. Jeff and I try to take her with us as much as possible.
She loves her brother and has taken to kissing his cheeks all the time. She also likes to manipulate with his arms and help him play toys with her. It's kind of adorable. Nicholas loves all the attention she gives him.
Our sweet munchkin is definitely a toddler now and a baby no longer. I miss those precious baby days, but I really love watching her grow and learn in her environment. She is a blessing straight from Heaven!

Happy St. Valentines Day

Mini Mechanic

Ella is a girl after her Daddy's heart.

Mischievous Munchkin

Yesterday Ella got into the pantry and dumped an entire box of Cheerios on the kitchen floor. I couldn't help but laugh and told her with a smile on my face that she needed to eat all of the Cheerios off the floor. She made a good effort munching and crunching the little O's and when her tummy was full, she grabbed the empty box and started stuffing the remaining Cheerios back inside. I tried to help her by vacuuming up the Cheerios, but this must of made her mad because she started crying immediately. Apparently dozens and dozens of Cheerios in ones tummy was not quite enough.



Ella has also proven to be quite the escape artist. Anytime the front door is unlocked, she very carefully and quietly opens the door and makes a break for the outdoors. A few evenings ago as I was driving to work, Jeff called me and asked that I lock the door behind me when I leave for work. He explained that he went to the bathroom and then was helping Nicholas when he realized that he didn't know where Ella was. He walked through the house calling her name and finally saw that the front door was wide open and Ella was staring at him through the glass (screen) door. He picked her up and her socks were soaking wet which made him think she had walked around in the grass in the front yard. She had only been outside for a minute or two but Jeff was freaked out, and rightly so. Thankfully we don't live on a busy street, I would guess a total of ten cars drive down our street on any given day, but from now on we will be keeping the front door locked at all times.


Ella also has ninja skills in escaping from her high chair even when she is strapped in. This morning I went to give Nicholas his morning treatment and left Ella strapped in her high chair after she had finished breakfast. By the time I came back she had wiggled her way out of the securely tightened straps and was standing on the seat getting ready to climb onto the tray. Several weeks ago when she did this, I tightened the straps as tight as they could comfortably fit and lowered her high chair so it is not too far off the ground. I assumed this would keep her safe and secure, but now I know never to question our mini Houdini.

Oh, the joys of parenting a fun-loving toddler. To keep myself sane, I have started reading Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood, it has been helpful in giving tips on how to be patient and how to give choices to get children to make healthy ones that distract from misbehavior. It is very helpful book, but Ella is definitely one to keep both eyes on!

Disclaimer: The last three pictures were re-enactment photos, which probably completely reinforced her misbehavior, but were a must for her scrapbook. Bad, bad mommy.

Happy 30th birthday to my sweet husband! I just found these photos...they are a couple years old, but I love discovering ones I haven't seen in awhile. Love you honey, I hope your day was wonderful!

Wave of Emotions

Parenting a child with a terminal illness means that I ride a wave of emotions on any given day. I can go from elation at him saying a new sentence to sobbing tears of sadness when I watch him trying so hard to do things his little sister can do with ease. The thing that tugs at my heart right now is when Nicholas says, "Mom, I want to get down and play." What he is really telling me is that he wants to run around and chase his sister, play with toys like she can, and follow me around as I do my daily chores. It is the new thing that makes me cry nearly every day. At three and a half, Nicholas should be able to walk, to run, to jump, to hop, to move his arms and legs every which way. He is starting to realize that he is physically different from us and his sister, but he does not have the vocabulary to explain to me how not being able to move makes him feel.

Nicholas does not have his own power wheelchair. When he got one to trial at home last year, he absolutely hated it. He wanted nothing to do with it and when we would strap him in it and encourage him to move about, he would cry and whine until we would take him out. Just yesterday I asked if he would like to try one again and he answered with and enthusiastic "yes!" So I will be contacting our rep this week to see if we can get a loaner chair again for Nicholas to try out. It might just be what he needs to feel like a "normal" kid.

Nicholas really is the sweetest boy and never, ever complains about anything. He is happy just to be with his family and friends. He just likes to feel included with whatever is going on around him. I often think about how he is so similar to other kids his age and rarely even notice that he cannot move anymore. Not moving is just part of who he is and who he has always been. The part that I have the most trouble with is the terminal part of his diagnosis. The unknown is what terrifies me the most. I would be the happiest mother in the world if I left this world before my children, which is the natural order of things. I know a small number of people living with SMA who have surpassed the prognosis of SMA. Some men and women are in their 30s and 40s. I recently read a story about a mom who has SMA who gave birth to two children. There is a young man who just started his first year of college last fall. These men and women inspire me and I cling to hope that Nicholas will live to see adulthood. I can only pray that medical researchers can get funding to find a cure in the next few years, which would definitely prolong Nicholas's life and would hopefully offer a better quality of life, allowing him more movement, and many more years on this Earth.

A few nights ago, I lost hours of sleep because I went to what I call the "dark place." It is a place where I imagine the words I will say about my son at his funeral, the place where I wonder what we will dress him in when his casket is lowered into the ground, the place where I try to imagine what life would look like without him here. It is an awful, dismal, scary place that leaves me bawling and sobbing and shaking with fear. It makes me feel helpless and powerless and lost. I can only allow myself to go to this "dark place" once every six months or so, because it leaves me emotionally drained and depressed for several days at a time.

The only thing that pulls me out of the darkness is imagining my son's beautiful face. His wise eyes remind me that neither he nor I are in charge of his destiny. He smile tells me that he chose this life. That his life of suffering is changing people's hearts, one at a time, mine included. He reminds me that he is bringing people (even long time believers) closer to Christ. He reminds me that this earthly life is but a mere blip in time and that we will eventually spend all of eternity together in Heaven. Only then can I return to the present moment and remember how blessed I am that this amazing little soul chose me to be his mommy. I could never have asked God for a more precious gift and there is no way I can ever repay Him for his generosity. What I know I can do, what I will spend the rest of my life doing, is trying to live a life of love. A life that will make my son proud. I will tell his story while he is here and for years after he is gone. I will make the best of each moment and celebrate his accomplishments. I will make sure that each person I encounter feels a bit more joy and happiness because that is how people feel when they are around my son. He is a shining example of true love, compassion, and patience. Nicholas has forever changed our world and we will never, ever be the same.

Bathroom Remodel

Our ugly, outdated bathroom before the remodel:


The frame for the new pocket door in the middle of the renovation:

The finished bathroom:




The last couple of weeks Jeff and I, along with our friend, Nathan, who is a contractor, have been remodeling the main bathroom in our house. Our house consists of two bathrooms and both are tiny. The main bathroom has a bath tub where the kids take baths everyday. Because the bathroom is so small, the door used to open into the room which made it super difficult to get Nicholas in and out of the tub since he is growing to be such a long boy. Jeff had the idea to put in a pocket door to allow us more room to maneuver Nicholas and make for an easier time getting him in and out of the tub. Since we had to tear out a wall, we decided we should also update the extremely ugly mustard yellow and white surround. Nathan tiled both the tub surround and the floor, we bought new tub fixtures, new light fixtures, and added a nice white wood trim around the base of the floor. We also painted the cabinets white and the walls a neutral color. Now we just have to add a new mirror, towel rack, shower curtain, and accessories. We have been living in a mess for the last couple of weeks and I am so happy to finally have the bathroom renovation almost complete!

Bathroom Update

Before



After






This is our on-suite bathroom and it was in desperate need of an update. It is a small space and the dark wall color and cabinets made it feel like a cave. I painted the walls a light grey/blue to give it a more open feel and added lots of white accents which I think make any bathroom feel clean and bright. I used the same mirror, just painted the frame white and I painted the cabinets white as well. I bought new towels and a "shower curtain" which is actually a window panel to cover our ugly stand-up shower. I swear no matter how hard I scrub that thing, I cannot get it clean enough and it drives me crazy. So the curtain helps hide the shower and I am happy-out of sight, out of mind. I also bought a new cabinet to hold all of our toiletries and a new shelf to hang necklaces and display some items. We picked out new light fixtures since the ones we had before kept flickering. I also ordered glass pulls for the cabinet. I added pops of color with coral: a candle, soap, and bought a new floral jewelry box to organize all of my rings, bracelets, and earrings.

We are currently in the middle of a true bathroom remodel of our main bathroom complete with new tile for the floor and bath tub, paint for the cabinets, new wall color, new trim, and a pocket door to help get Nicholas in and out with ease. We plan to use the leftover floor tiles in this as well which will look nicer than the linoleum. I will post photos of our main bathroom space when it's finished next weekend.

Our next home renovation project will be hardwood floors in early spring. I am SO excited to rip out our yucky carpet and replace them with beautiful wood flooring! 2012 is a year of home projects for the Gustafsons!